the Age Old Game of Love
This article is featured in Romancing Singapore Website
So… the eyes met, conversation
was good, the mood was set and the feeling has been
mutual. You exchanged contact numbers and then? What’s
next? If you don’t have a game plan, it may be
doomed before it ever gets started.
Fortunately or unfortunately, you are
not the only one.
We set the scene for you, step by step
to win this age old game of love!
Planning for the First Date
Arrange the date few days in advance, avoid
last minute request as this increases the possibility
of your date turning you down. Rejection does affect
your confidence to ask him or her out again. Besides
you do not want to be seen as THAT desperate.
Choose a day that you are least stressed
up, so if Monday is loonly – leave the “Mondays”
OUT. Have enough rest for the day – or risk looking
haggard in front of your date. Go on the date feeling
your best and being your best.
Give 100% of your attention to your
date. Show genuine interest, listen and get to know
about each other. Relationship is about communication,
dating is not about “what you know” and
“what you can do” or “how much you
have” bRAg-a-tHOn. Give your date the due attention.
Leave your blackberry alone for a while and a little
human attention might just go a long way.
Last but not least, plan with your date’s
comfort in mind, appropriate setting and date movies
to watch. If you think that she/he might not enjoy the
setting – most likely the chances are that you
are right. A little asking will do a world of charm.
Maximize Your Appearance
How many of you heard the saying “beauty
lies in the eye of the beholder?” – well
that is a excuse to be lazy. You know that the first
Suppose you saw an unkempt date that
turns up wearing shoddy outfit looking like a refugee
from some lost world at a posh restaurant dinner. Chances
are that you will discreetly leave him to find his direction
home – alone.
Face it, if you do not respect your
date – then don’t be hurt by their action
to leave you to your due desserts.
On the other hand, to some of our readers,
don’t wear your black power suit on the first
date… very overpowering if the date is set in
a causal setting like a hawker center. What if the Kopi-auntie
laughs at your dressing efforts? It would be a very
sad case right. Not to mentioned that your date would
The last thing you want to remind your
date is work; who wants to know how much paper work
you need to fill up and how important you are? If you
are sincere and genuinely likes your date, you want
her/him to get to know you better as a person and not
what you do, but who you are. (*Remember that)
So take off that coat and reveal some
friendly colours or styles. This will set your date
in for the romantic mode.
Colours play an important factor in
expressing yourself. Some people look bright and cheerful
in lime green, while others might look like a glowing
string bean. Wear colours that bring out the best of
your skin tone, to appear friendlier and warm.
Select clothing styles that are right
for you base on your body type. Camouflage the flaws
and play up your best body features. Get an image consultant
to help you find your best colours, fits and styles.
(*for the clueless – this helps, trust us)
It is only natural to be nervous, and to prevent
yourself from yakking in fear, calm yourself down, remove
the nervous vibes by having a happy song playing at
the back of your mind. *Remember -- It is better to
speak clearer and slower than mumble.
Adopt a “Seriously, don’t
be too serious” attitude. Keep the date light
and fun, happy vibes are infectious, keep laughter and
smiles always and remember to keep the admiration and
respect in place. After all you want your date to remember
you for the good times you had together! *Note to Type-A
personalities; NO ONE propose or wants to marry a date
on a first date; try your best to keep it to the 10th
Dating is about knowing more about the
other party, what they like and how they feel about
things. It is also discovering your own preference.
The more you date, the clearer you have in mind who
you want to spend the rest of your life with.
For the end result of finding love,
all the effort put forth is well worth it! Happy dating!
~ Lydia Gan